Think of the friends you have had over your lifetime. Say a silent, all-inclusive prayer for them that God will meet their needs today. Some may have passed on, others you see regularly, and others have gone their way and may be totally out of touch. It’s interesting how life happens, and friends come and go.
The proverb I chose today speaks volumes on how we can be an understanding friend to someone going through a dark season. Verse 20 says, “Singing cheerful songs to a person with a heavy heart is like taking someone’s coat in cold weather or pouring vinegar in a wound.” I am one that believes music can heal anything. Musicians are like that. However, we are warned here in this nugget of wisdom. Don’t be too cheery around friends who are struggling. It doesn’t help. Your upbeat demeanor is NOT going to “rub off.” It may even make the situation worse, like pouring vinegar on a wound – ouch!
Singing cheerful songs is a metaphor for being too cheerful and intent on lifting spirits. That’s what we would “think” would work. But if you have ever been the one to be down, having a ray of sunshine glaring in your face does not make the troubles go away.
What should we do instead? That will depend largely on the person who is depressed, grieving, or struggling with something. In general, they are seeking compassion and intelligent sympathy. Sometimes just sitting quietly with them is the best thing. Try to not say a word. Just be. If you have a hard time sitting still like I do, then pray. Sit there quietly and just pray silently to yourself for your friend. At least you will be doing “something.” They don’t even need to know.
You could also ask them if there is something you could help them do. Don’t expect an answer. But they may allow you to run an errand for them, or make some tea, or sweep the kitchen floor. Just offer YOU. Offer your time. Let them know you are there for them. That will go much farther than you trying to talk them out of their pain with your encouragement and cheeriness. I like the words of 1 Corinthians 12:25-26, “This makes for harmony among the members, so that all the members care for each other. If one part suffers, all the parts suffer with it, and if one part is honored, all the parts are glad.”
When you’re the friend who needs support because you are feeling lost, alone, desperate, or depressed, remember who never leaves your side. Jesus. Maybe it will help to put an empty chair beside you and picture Jesus sitting with you, holding your hand.
Take some time today to think of people in your life who may be struggling. Do they need an understanding friend like you?
Let’s pray … Lord, help me to see places where I can help others. May I be sensitive to the needs of others and be the understanding friend they need at this time. Give me compassion. Help me to keep my mouth shut. Thank you that you are always by my side. I love the assurance I feel knowing I am never alone. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
