Sexual purity is the topic today. I’ll never forget my “birds and the bees” discussion with my mother. Awkward to be sure! It was no easier having the “talk” with my own daughter. There was a common thread in both, to “save yourself for marriage.” Now, I understand it was a Biblical thing that God ordained for his people. Although today’s reading suggests it was serious business.
Again, I am in awe of our God who is so thorough in his protection. He truly cares for us and wants the best for us. I would have to say that in this day and age, it is harder and harder for young girls to stay pure until their wedding day. And, when virginity is lost, it is not a life or death situation, at least in the culture I was raised in. There was disapproval, and girls had a “bad reputation” when they were promiscuous outside of marriage, but death did not result.
Sex outside of marriage is more common now as couples want to explore and get to know whether they are compatible. Sex is glorified on TV shows and movies to be the accepted way of doing things, especially outside of marriage. Those trying to hold their virginity dear often face ridicule and contempt. One interesting thing I heard was that when you jump in bed with your spouse on your wedding night these days…it’s like you’ve got a whole bed full of past partners that have led you to this moment. That certainly takes away the precious gift that God intended the sexual bond to be between a husband and wife. Our text says to do otherwise was “shameful conduct.” That’s quite a slap in the face for those who have done it “wrong.”
I do wonder though how many times having a stigma about sex can hurt the eventual sexual relationship. I suppose it comes down to how you are taught. Being told as a young girl to avoid sex tends to make you afraid of it. Why else would you be told not do it? Like being told not to touch a burner when it’s turned on so you don’t get burned. You begin to be careful, even fearful, of burning yourself. Even if you were told “God wants it this way,” for a young person full of hormones, it is way to easy to say, “I don’t care, I know this is better for me.”
So, if we’re afraid of sex, how much fun will it be when we finally get to do it? How will we know what to do? What if it hurts? What if it we do it wrong? For over achievers and people pleasers, there can be a lot of pressure, and that pressure can lead to a lot of dysfunction when it comes to having a healthy sexual relationship. Understanding why having sex one day is shameful, and the next, after getting married, it’s not can be confusing for the brain and emotions to deal with.
There is so much to be said about sex and how beautiful it can be with the right person. Simply put, that is what God was intending. However, in the days when this was written, many marriages were arranged, and love was not part of the equation. I suppose sexual relations were a way of bonding those couples together even when the heart wasn’t involved.
How is this passage speaking to you?
Let’s pray…Lord, thank you for the beautiful gift you have given us. There are many facets of sex to explore, enjoy, and marvel at. You have thought of everything. Our bodies are such an amazing design. I pray that people will honor their bodies more than they do now and be more mindful of how you wanted us to relate to each other sexually. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
